I took my son Taylor to apply for a job for the first time.  On the way to the nearby grocery store, I turned to him and said “Did you brush your teeth?  Because it’s very bad to apply for a job with stinky breath.” 

Taylor: “Why?”

Me:  “Well, it’s just gross, but, more important, when you apply for a job the clerks have a secret code.”

Taylor:  “What is it?”

Me:  “Well, for example, no one wants to work with a ‘stink breath,’ so if you had halitosis, the clerk would write an ‘SB’ at the top of the app, that way the person that does the hiring wouldn’t call you for an interview.”

 “Another code is ‘SH'”

Taylor:  “What does that stand for?”

Me:  “Super Hot.   That’s usually good, but you definitely don’t want to be labeled a ‘BBT.'”

Taylor:  “Why?”

Me:  “It stands for ‘Bugs Between Teeth’ and no one wants an employee with flies and shit between his teeth.”

Taylor:   “I think you are making this up.”

Me:  “Okay, I made that last one up, but the rest is true!”

I hope he gets hired to I can clue him in on “first day of work” etiquette, which, as we all know, includes a lot of  arm flapping, foot stomping  and  frequent use of the phrase “Sir!  Yes, Sir!” without regard to the sex of the fellow employee.