“Of all the animals, the boy is the most unmanageable.” (Plato)

After my son turned in his biology project he was complaining “I didn’t learn ANYTHING making that cell”

I told him, “Yes, you did, you learned that your mother loves you enough to ride your ass to get it done.”

Taylor replied, eye-rolling and sighing huffily “But I ALREADY KNEW that!

Boys. They are wonderful, mysterious creatures.

Sometimes mysterious and not so wonderful.

For example, last night we attended Taylor’s National Honor Society ceremony.   The freshmen  were called up on stage one-by-one to receive a certificate.    I had a moment of panic when I noticed his name was NOT listed on the program, but remembered that he had attended a practice session that day, so surely it was just a typo.  

They asked the parents to rise when their child’s name was called and I breathed a sigh of relief when, last alphabetically, they called out “Taylor Wood”

followed by:

Child of

Chris Wood.

Yes, just “of Chris Wood.”

It was awkward.  Chris rose.  Then sort of pulled me up.

We returned to our seats, thinking, “Gosh, they are incompetent, first leaving his name off the program, then not listing his mother.”   Until the mother sitting in front of me turned and said, “H. (her son) told me Taylor FORGOT to list his mother.”

Forgot?   Am I not the person driving him to school everyday?   Making sure his homework is done?  Picking him up from chess?  Forcing him to attend the ceremony?  (While wearing a tie, no less!) national-honors-society-2009


And there is that whole “having given birth” to him business, too!  Plus breastfeeding, waking up with him EVERY NIGHT for two plus years, changing his diaper, for longer than he would care for anyone to know!  (3+ years of that, seriously!)

Today I also found out that Taylor not listing his mother was a topic of much conversation at the practice.  Other kids noticed and mentioned it to their parents (who mentioned it to me at work today).  Taylor could have easily requested a correction during the practice, but did not.

And Taylor didn’t think to mention any of this to me before the ceremony.  So I was totally blindsided. 

And left feeling bewildered and upset.

Partially from embarrassment, because I am sure the other parents in this small town are wondering WTF is up, that Taylor would choose NOT to list his mother, but mainly I’m left wondering if my child is just truly terribly thoughtless or if he really is that big of a jackelope.


10 Responses to ““Of all the animals, the boy is the most unmanageable.” (Plato)”

  1. HollowSquirrel Says:

    He. Did. NOT! Taylor MiddleName LastName, you owe your amazing and selfless mother one big gushy apology, young man!

  2. idonotknowme Says:

    Without knowing anything about your family structure/dynamic/history, I suspect it has something to do with the hyphenated last name. Does your son use the hyphenated last name like you do or just your husband’s last name? Maybe he felt weird about listing him and his father as W and you as JW.

    Or it was simply inexplicable teenage thoughtlessness and obliviousness.

  3. Jennifer Says:

    Yes, I told him he “Owes me BIG TIME! Like 10 foot fubs big time!”

    He did say “Jacobsen-Wood” is too long, but still!

    I’m sure some of you think I’m paranoid that people would talk about this, and I was thinking maybe I was overreacting, then I walked into the chess banquet last night and was greeted with:

    “Hey, Mrs. Wood, it’s nice to see you, I thought you didn’t exist!”
    “We were worried you were going to be upset, so I was watching your face when they didn’t call your name but you seemed okay.”


  4. Eyebrows McGee Says:

    I vote thoughtless and then too embarrassed to make a correction in front of a bunch of people. Still, he owes you some hand-picked dandelions or something. 🙂

  5. Cameron Says:

    I’m going with Eyebrows…it probably came up at practice, and he played it down as if, ‘no big deal’. Then he was stuck playing it down, he was pry just too embarrassed to fix it.

  6. Susan at Sticky,Gooey,Creamy,Chewy Says:

    As the mother of a high school freshman, I feel your pain. When my daughter’s friends are around, I’m supposed to act like I don’t even know her! Kids can be so thoughtless, and yes, even mean at that age. I try to take comfort in the fact that this, too, shall pass.

  7. Sarah Says:

    I totally think it was just a simple mistake that he was probably to busy talking to friends or whatever at practice and just thought Oh well, Mom wont even notice or care that she was mentioned on there. He’ll get it someday when hes a parent : )

    Congrats though on your son being in the National Honors Society!!

  8. Jennifer Says:

    Yes, I think Taylor really didn’t get it that I would be upset and he is shy, so was likely hesitant to bring it up. On the other hand, it seems like he should have enough empathy to know his mom would be upset!

    And, in his defense, when we got home and I seemed unhappy about it he was, not exactly apologetic, but thoughtful. He took photos with us (which he hates to do) and sat in the kitchen with me while I baked a cake and then said it was really good, when it really was not!

  9. K Says:

    Oh – that’s bad.

    Mom should definitely always be listed.

    I also have a son and even though he is little he does similar stuff. He always chooses dad over mom, every chance he gets.

  10. Katrina Says:

    You’re kind of scaring me since I have four boys! They should give a separate award just to the mothers in these instances! 😉 I’m sure he’ll make it up to you by turning out to be one great young man and fine adult. Right, tell me I’m right!

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