Random Tuesday Thoughts

I’ve joined “Random Tuesday Thoughts” hosted by the voluble Keely of “The Un Mom.”     So, yes, now I have two Tuesday things to post about, food and thought!  

Hmm… I’d hate to tell you which I enjoy more!  (Thinking or eating? Damn, the scale DOES NOT lie!)

Random things I’ve said or been told this last week:

“At my work we pee,  A LOT!”   (Damn cancer preventing, diuretic green tea!) 

“I’m not sure if my husband is a grower or a show-er, because I don’t think I’ve ever seen him naked and NOT erect.”

“Do you think our neighbor is trying to kill us?  Because I totally do.  Death by expired foodstuff.”

“I have my phone set on ‘vibrator.'”

“You know, if I were a teenage girl and NOT your mother, I would have a HUGE crush on you!  You are just my type.  Quiet AND arrogant.”

“You are a creepy sucker.”

“Today at (church) youth group someone told a REALLY bad joke:  ‘Bob goes into Walmart and runs in to a little guy dressed in greeen.  Bob is like, “OMG, a leprechaun!  Can you grant my three wishes?”‘  The leprechaun says, “sure, what do you want?”  Bob says, “I want a new sports car,  a beautiful blond and a million dollars.”  The leprechaun says, “Okay, the car is in the parking lot.  The blond is in the front seat and the million dollars is in the trunk.  But now you have to do something for me.   You have to give me a blow job in the bathroom.”  Bob does it, then says, “I can’t believe you made me give you a blow job.”  The other guy replies, “I can’t believe you thought I was a leprechaun.”‘

“ow.  Ow.  OW.  What part of  ‘ow’ do you think means, ‘do it again, Again, AGAIN!?'”

“You better hope I never get cancer!  Because, shit, I’d be freakin’ unbearable to live with.”

“If my husband pisses me off, I just smile and put a little more mayo on his sandwich.”

“Goddammit, I can’t get the ‘Random Tuesday Thoughts’ button thingy to upload!”


2 Responses to “Random Tuesday Thoughts”

  1. idonotknowme Says:

    One of those sounds like it might have been caused by somebody taking the advice in Cameron’s post on HotDads.

  2. Sarah Says:

    I have been missing a ton of your posts since I forgot you moved your blog! Doh! : )

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