Rare Form

Both of my kids were needlessly and endlessly aggravating last night.

Reagan, who has pleaded with me not to attend her Scholastic Bowl meets (“You make me nervous!”), upon hearing that I have a hair appointment tonight said “You aren’t coming to my Scholastic Bowl meet? I feel really special. I guess you care more about your hair than your daughter!”

To which I responded “Yep.”

Taylor, when questioned about homework responded, “*Jesus! MOM! I didn’t even have class today!” (They had gone on a day long trip to the Lincoln Museum).

His Game Cube, PS2 and X-Box are now residing in my closet, not to be played for many a week.

Sometimes it just makes me think, WTF is wrong with my kids? They rarely get in trouble for their actions, it’s almost always their attitudes that are the problem.

Really, how hard would it have been for Taylor to say, politely, “I don’t have any homework today?” It would have saved him a scolding and a technological grounding.

Or for Reagan to say, “I’d really like you to go to my Scholastic Bowl meet?” (Of course, I think she didn’t say that because she doesn’t actually want me to go to the meet; she just wants me to feel bad that I’m not going.)

Recently I asked my mom if I was as difficult a teen as Reagan and even she said “Well, I don’t think you were as dramatic.”

To be honest, I wasn’t that well behaved, I went to parties and drank underage. I smoked pot (once), smoked a cigarette (once), lied about my whereabouts (thousands of times), skipped school (a few times) and generally was pretty foolish.

However, I was PLEASANT about it. I lied with a CHEERFUL demeanor. And, in an effort to stay under the radar, I had a GOOD attitude.

Again, I ponder, WTF is the matter with my kids?

*Despite our lack of religion I hate it when my son says “Jesus!;” I find it disprespectful to those who are religious and Taylor is reprimanded for saying it. (Of course, the reprimands haven’t worked yet, so we might need to work on Plan B, maybe a substitute word of annoyance, like Harold!”)


15 Responses to “Rare Form”

  1. Rixblix Says:

    It must be something in the air! 1# stomped his feet and hollered because he had to take out the kitchen garbage AND the “little” (bathroom) garbages!

  2. jenjw4 Says:

    Oh, we dealt with that issue last night too. It seemed to be one of those one problem after another kinds of nights. I ended up going into our bedroom, shutting the door and vegging out to a Dexter DVD while the husband dealt with the miscreants.

  3. Grandma's Attic Says:

    A child with a bad attitude at that age does not change when they ‘grow up’. I landed my 23 yo ‘child’ a perfect job for her, only 1-2 nights a week while she is going to college and raising a baby, to which she ‘thanked’ me with an entire bitch session. Yeah. It does not get better with age. I never spoke to my mom the way she speaks to me, and it has been that way since she hit puberty. Thankless. Grrrrrrrrrr

  4. postsimian Says:

    lmao.. “the miscreants.”

    You win the Awesome Award today, hands down.

    GA, you have a door, boots and legs. You put one in another, and kick something through the other thing, catch my drift? 😀

    ANYWAY, my son is sooooooooo lazy. He doesn’t even go to the bathroom. He just sits there and shits in his diaper. After 9 months of this, you’d think he’d have figured out how to use a litter box. Jeez. ¬_¬

  5. East Bluff Barbie Says:

    I had it too last night. I started as I was making dinner. As soon as my middle son seen an onion he declared that he wasn’t going to eat. After the stench, I really couldn’t blame him but we have a policy that we try new things at least once. You would have thought I asked him to slaughter kittens. He carried on and on. Then his younger brother, who liked the dinner suddenly wouldn’t eat it. It just kept snow balling into one aggrevation after another. I have a feeling tonight will not be better.

  6. katearch1978 Says:

    My oldest has recently taken up lying. The other day I asked what was in her bulging book bag. Her response was in incredulous “BOOKS!!” I looked and found a sweater, make-up, flip-flops, 2 Webkinz, and a book. Then today I caught her half way down to the bus stop with her brother’s DS. It has been clearly stated that the DS does not go to school or anywhere without prior consent. Her brother didn’t even know she had it. Then she lied to me about it once she was caught red handed! GRRR!!!!

    Good luck, Jen. It sounds as if all of our children have caught a case of the asses!

  7. Jimi Says:

    Cabin fever reaching its pitch before Spring allows everyone to be thrown outdoors? I was like you Jen, a smile on my face and the worst untruths flying from my lips. If I did my chores I was pretty much left alone to run wild through the subdivision.

    How about “frack” for a substitute word?

  8. mortonmalaise Says:

    I’m so never having kids.

  9. jenjw4 Says:

    GA-that’s not encouraging! You’re supposed to lie, to give us encouragement that the future will certainly be better!

    Reno-the lazy bastard! When will he ever learn?

    And I guess we turned out okay…?

    Oh, that would drive me crazy! It’s the worst when they look you in the face and lie (but see above comment to Jimi…)

    MM-yes, eventually you will see babies and think “ooooo…. how adorable, I want one.” BUT they all outgrow that cuteness/innocence… (just think of that baby as being karma biting you in the ass for all your childhood transgressions)

  10. jenjw4 Says:

    Oh, and EBB, I didn’t forget you! I hate it when they are picky like that. My kids will have eaten 1/2 of something and then see a tiny piece of onion or mushroom and suddenly they hate it. I want to scream “but you were JUST EATING IT!”

    Was there a full moon last night? Or maybe Jimi is right, it’s cabin fever combined with the promise of spring…

  11. mortonmalaise Says:

    If my offspring will bite me in the ass for all of my transgressions, then I’m getting my vas deferens snipped ASAP. I did some ridiculously stupid shit between the ages of 15 and 21 that my parents never found out about.

  12. Ramble On Says:

    I look at my son, who is a 40 year old father of a two year old and my 28 year old daughter with a Master’s Degree and thinking about going back to pick up the classes needed for a teaching certificate, I don’t even remember what the problems were. We got through them and they came out very different but quite O.K. It was worth it! Those of you with little ones, grit your teeth, hang on. You are making memories!

  13. jadedgirl Says:

    Oh boy did I have you beat…I was pure EVIL…which completely explains my demon spawn…

    So, my behavior as a child/adolescent is now coming full circle…karmic retribution.

    My kid was a pain last night as well…he was hyponitized by the TV and ignored my pleas to get ready to go…15 min later I was still yelling and still waiting. SO…I headed out the door, keys in hand…and started the car…he heard me revving the engine, ran out to my drive and proceeded to throw a plastic nerf gun at the window of my car, stomping his foot, screaming at the top of his lungs and crying out…YOU CAN’T LEAVE ME…YOU ARE SO MEAN TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    He then he spilled kool aid on my brothers cream carpet, smacked his female cousin in the face when rough housing, and broke his other cousins toy tank.

    He was in the time out chair for most of the visit to my big bros house, needless to say.

    It MUST have been a full moon.

    BAD karma…BAD BAD karma.

    Calgon…Take me away!!!!!!!!!!

    Karma…I get all that karma coming back to me.

  14. Michael Says:

    I was raised with the back of my Dad’s hand as motivation. I never liked my Dad much for that so I’ve tried to be more reasonable with my 3 sons. I can see where simply punching them might be more effective but we have refrained. It gets real tough during the testosterone years from about 12 – 20 but that is when we started double-teaming them. After I softened them up by letting them get mad at me … their mother would reason with them. So far … so good. The eldest is 20 next week and actually seems to be maturing into a respectable young man.

  15. Anon E. Mouse Says:

    PLEASE do not take the name “Harold” in vain.
    I has a sacred place in the heart of many WIU alums who would often visit Hardee’s late at night (early in the morning).

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